Inconvenient News,
       by smintheus

Wednesday, March 09, 2011

  Newt Gingrich, Loving America One Woman at a Time

Presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich, a serial adulterer, has helpfully explained to TV evangelist Pat Robertson’s network that some "not appropriate" things "happened in [his] life" partly due to his patriotism and his superb work ethic.

Newt Gingrich: “There’s no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate. And what I can tell you is that when I did things that were wrong, I wasn’t trapped in situation ethics, I was doing things that were wrong, and yet, I was doing them. I found that I felt compelled to seek God’s forgiveness. Not God’s understanding, but God’s forgiveness. I do believe in a forgiving God. And I think most people, deep down in their hearts hope there’s a forgiving God.

There’s more blather along those lines at the CBN link. It’s clear that Newt, having sought and (apparently) obtained God’s forgiveness, is now seeking the presidency. These are the lines along which he hopes to defend his repulsive personal life.

The first tactic will be to describe his vile behavior using passive/semi-passive circumlocutions (‘mistakes were made’). The second is to be photographed with God at his side as often as possible, preferably doing His work castigating non-Christians and the non-forgiving.

And thirdly, Newt plans to trumpet his squalid record as further evidence he’s a super duper patriot. I can already envisage his campaign motto for 2012:

Loving America One Woman at a Time!

crossposted at

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